OK, I can't believe I haven't written in a month!!!!!!!!!! I find myself reflecting so much more since I had Kamryn and since I started to blog. I lay in bed and reflect about the great day we had or the new adventure we took and I want to get it down. To remember that moment and what I was feeling. I write it in my thoughts, but I am always to tired to actually sit at the computer and "post". I really wanted to blog as a way for me to capture moments and memories for me (and one day my girls) to look back on. In blogging, versus just writing in a journal, I also hope someone could get a glimpse into our lives and see a child with Down syndrome, as just a child. I hope that maybe, like tossing a stone into a lake and causing a ripple, one person who has never met someone with Down syndrome will "meet" Kamryn though my blog. That any stereo types they had, or fears, or misunderstandings would be shattered. Like the stone, I hope that one person would share with someone else and the world will be a better place for my little girl to grow up in. It sounds crazy, but it's what I hope for.
There is so much I need to share, as we have had a wonderful summer!!!!!! Not only have we had some great vacations and adventures, but.........
Jaden graduated from the Jr. Life Guard program through the state beaches. Which had us at the beach daily for three weeks. (I have to say I was a little beached out after that).
Naomi learned to ride a two wheel bike (she just asked Diondray to remove the training wheels and then road off, there was no teaching involved)!
Brynn, well she just continues to crack us up with her not so 4 year old responses....the other day she said,
"mom, my head hurts"
me, "what does it feel like?"
her, "I just told you, like my head hurts"
OK, silly question on my part.
Kamryn, well she is growing so fast and tomorrow she is TWO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! We had her birthday party on Saturday and it was such a relaxing evening with family and friends. Pizza, blue berries and strawberries were served, as those are some of her favorite foods! She also loves Barney and enjoys singing times w/Alex and Leah. She loves books (just like all our girls) and will sit and flip though a book on her own or in your lap while you read to her. She loves to open drawers and pull everything out, cabinets too. Her receptive language is, well, she has it and understands everything I would expect a two year old to. She is very verbal too.
Words she says:
shhhhh-that might not be considered a word
Words she says, but not clear:
sings: only signs when asked, she is more verbal
She walks, kind of runs.
She loves "duck-duck-goose"
Loves to take a bath-we don't even say the word or she will say and sign until you just give her one!
She will go into the kitchen, get a sandwich bag out of the drawer, go into the pantry and call me to come and fill it.
She puts her purse (or any purse) over her shoulder and will kiss me good-bye, then is "off" somewhere in the house.
I could go on and on.
The first year of Kamryn's life was, to date, the hardest time in my life. It brought me to the edge of the cliff. I stood there and much of me wanted to jump. The pain was horrible. I wanted a "go back"..........I wanted to go back to who I was before her diagnosis. I wanted to feel like I did before my life had shattered. I wanted to go back so BAD the hurt was excruciating. I wanted to take Jaden, Naomi and Brynn and run. I knew there was no "go back" and I didn't want to go forward. It was a tough year.
The second year of Kamryn's life, I have grown and transformed more in one year, than I have my first 34. I have learned more about who I "thought" I was and who I want to be. I have experienced unconditional love in its purest form. I have discovered the beauty of truly living in each day, which can require constant effort-that is so worth it. There is so much I have learned and discovered, however I'm at a loss for words to express it. I know the minute I lay down to go to sleep the words will flow. For now, the only thing that is running through my mind is the song I sing to my girls at night before bed (I am no singer, but they love it:)....the words are:
I'm the luckiest mommy in the world, because I have four of the most amazing girls. My Jaden, Naomi, Brynn and Kamryn.